June 5th … A Day Early
I found my original June 4th Post!
I’m writing this today, because I know I won’t have the time (and possibly no signal) to do it tomorrow …
Tomorrow is THE day … June 5th. The day I dread and the day I am anxious to begin.
The day I Dread … On June 5th, 2016 my husband (Charlie) passed. To call him my husband is an understatement … he was so much more … he is gone. I simply can’t put into words the range of emotions I experience each day as I learn to live without him.
Charlie was my biggest supporter in every aspect of my life. I spoke to him often about wanting to hike the AT. He had experienced many adventures in his life, including hiking parts of the AT. I on the other hand, had none. So he and I began to plan our AT thru hike. Those plans came to a halt when he was diagnosed with Stage 4, Metastatic Melanoma (Wear Sunscreen!!). Unfortunately, his decline was rapid, so we focused on my completing the thru hike solo … he said, “If anyone can do it, you can” … and so IAM!
The day I’m anxious to begin … This year has been difficult. Days filled with sadness, heartache, and tears. Everyday there are tears. Each month, on the 5th, I relive Charlie’s last moments and my grief seeps back in, as if it just happend. Charlie will never be gone from me but I need something significant to occur on the 5th, so this date will no longer be a day of dread, but instead a day of celebration.
So tomorrow, June 5th, I will celebrate Charlie, his life and his love, I will honor him and carry him with me as I mark this date with a new meaning.
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