Peeing in the Woods and Other Unlady Like Pursuits in the Great Outdoors.

3/18/15

Since I was a child, I have had many opportunities to pee in the woods. Hello, I grew up in Northern Minnesota and camped a lot. With age, peeing in the woods hasn’t gotten any easier to do. I thought it would be fun to write a little bit about it.  Besides, this day ended with struggle and I thought it was time for humor to kick in.
If it's hairy be very wary

If it’s hairy be very very wary.

The Squat: This is when your pants or around your ankles, you squat and pee. Here are a few general problems that can occur with this method. If you are too far from the ground, there is something called splash back. Fluid rains down from a great height and the next thing you know your pants, shoes, and socks  are now covered in pee from it hitting the ground and coming back at you. So,  now you learned to get lower, but you are my age and because of that you now have a bum knee to contend with. How about a solution of leaning against a tree to support yourself? Well, during the day that is fine idea,  but at night may not be a great idea, especially if you didn’t notice the poison ivy vine growing up the side of the tree. What about location for said activity?  Right now it is spring in Georgia which means no ground cover. So you think I’ll just find a big tree or rock and go behind that right?  No, You have picked your spot and the next thing you see is a hiker seeing you because you just picked a switchback to do your duty on.
What? What happened to all the ground cover??? Sadie we aren't in Minnesota anymore.

What? What happened to all the ground cover??? Sadie we aren’t in Minnesota anymore.

Pee Rag: This is usually a bandana that girl’s in particular hang from their backpacks and use to wipe pee from their person. Supposedly, if the sun shines on the bandana, it is purified. So for everyone concerned, never accept the use of a bandana that has been hanging off a backpack. I was trying to save on weight and cut a bandana into 4th’s and gave one to Sisu Sadie and I hung one off my pack. Needless to say, it was too small, so today I purchased a full size bandana. I just hope I don’t mix up my pee rag with my snot rag.

Sadie with her dangling pee rag.

Sadie with her dangling pee rag.

So, let’s move on to the next topic.

Dig and release.

Dig and release.

Hole Digging (not to be confused with Georgia gold digging): Hikers are told to dig a hole 6″-8″ deep. Nothing about diameter. So,  here I am digging my first hole because I wasn’t near any shelters which have laterines. I’m thinking to myself, just dig the diameter the size of a turd. Which I do. Problem, haven’t gone for two days. Before I know it the hole is full and flowing over. Oops! Well,  next I just covered it with dirt. What you are supposed to do is not have a full hole,  add dirt, mix and cover. I suppose one could just dig one BIG hole or 3 small ones in a row which you could just move down the line and use as needed.

Privies, Latrines and privacy screens, OH MY!

Privies, Latrines and privacy screens, OH MY!

Shelter Latrines: I know what you are thinking,  the ideal place to go. Let’s talk about the Gooch Mtn. Shelter latrine. Sisu Sadie and I needed water while we were there our second night on the trail.  We took the path to the water source which led below and past the latrine. Two hmms, we are collecting water below a latrine area and as we pass the latrine, we can actually see someone sitting on the pot. We can’t see their face, just from the seat down. Too much informatio? This is life o. The AT. Anyway, the next morning Sisu Sadie went for her morning consatutional and when she came back informed me that the pot was almost full to the top. Just so everyone knows who isn’t on the trail, after you go, one is to throw wood chips on top of what you did there which is supplied in a barrel.

There are devices that help women pee standing up. I have one, but to keep it clean seems more trouble than its worth.
 So, if your ever in the woods, needing to take care of business, look out for straight sticks, poison ivy and oak, as well as briars. Maybe next time I will write about snot flinging. Welcome to Jill’s World.
I hope that isn't a mountain of you know what back there.

I hope that isn’t a mountain of you know what back there.

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Comments 4

  • Kate : Mar 22nd

    Haha great post! The details no one wants to talk about but everyone is thinking about!

    Reply
  • Nancy : Mar 22nd

    Oh Jill you kill me you were funny growing up and still are. Loved the story and it’s all so true Thank God we learned this lesson growing up. Happy trails.

    Reply
  • Energizer : Apr 7th

    Hi Jill. My name is Vicky Maki. I live in Virginia, Mn. I work with Barb J. (lives in Hoyt lakes). I have hiked in California, SHT, and Isle Royal. I was so excited when I heard someone from our area was doing the AT. That has been a dream of mine for years. Hopefully when I retire. Anyway, I loved your pee story. I can relate….;-) I wish you a safe and fun journey…..God bless.

    Reply
    • Jill Aubin : Apr 8th

      I just saw this post. So new to blogging. I think it is harder to figure out than the hiking. Lol The first 2 weeks are really hard physically. Just don’t worry about mileage. Solo hiking is better than with a Partner which I found out the hard way. If I can help in anyway let me know. Friend me on Facebook if you haven’t already. I post pictures when I go to town to resupply. Keep hiking. 🙂

      Reply

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