A Hiker’s Adventures: Camping Fails and Mountain Top Dreams

Hey there, fellow adventurers! Today, I have the tale of my final night of gear testing at Joshua Tree. This was my second attempt at camping in recent weeks and my third day and night at Joshua Tree.

As you know on day two I was not feeling well and decided to cheat on my hiking diet when I indulged in some delicious town-acquired food. And let me tell you, it was totally worth it! I felt like a brand new person, ready to conquer the world. I woke up restored and rejuvenated and not queasy for the first time in five days! Despite that, I was just not hungry on the morning of day three so I didn’t eat breakfast at camp instead I packed a small day bag with snacks and started my hike.

Capturing Breathtaking Views (and Selfies):

My hike was in a relatively unused area of the park where I only saw 3 other people all day. Solitude at its finest! The views were breathtaking, and I couldn’t resist stopping every five seconds to capture them in a million photos. As a result, I may have taken a bit longer than planned, but I still hiked 7.5 miles with over 1200 feet of gain in under 4 hours, breaks included. Then with other random hikes, I reached about 23000 steps for the day.

How It Compares:

It is advised to start the AT slowly with only about 8 miles a day. No matter how badly I want to do more I do not want to get hurt, and I hear that early trail injuries force many people off the trail. I do not want to be a statistic. If I go down I don’t want it to be with intractable shin splits. It needs to be my decision made free of medical duress.

With that as the plan, my first full day on the AT should be from Springer to Hawk Mountain Shelter (8.1 miles and 1066 feet of gain). The next day will be Gooch with 8.6 miles and 1873 ft of gain – both well within the hikes and elevations I have completed easily each day. I even practice on mountains with over 1000ft of gain per mile because I think it is important to build up a tolerance to intense elevation gain – oh and I am clearly secretly a masochist.

Dreams of Appalachia:

As I hiked, I couldn’t help but daydream about my upcoming Appalachian Trail adventure. And let me tell you, the idea of nightly pick-ups at road crossings, fresh food, luxurious hotel beds, and warm showers sounded better and better. Can you blame me? Camping can be rough, especially when it’s freezing cold and powdered mashed potatoes are on the menu.

In the past, I’ve visited off-the-grid food stops such as the Teahouse at the Plain of the Six Glaciers and the Lake Agnes Teahouse both near Lake Louise (Banff) and I’ve also visited the hike-up Granite Park Chalet in Glacier NP. Are mountaintop concessions and drone-delivered pizza really too much to ask for? (sorta kidding). Actually, when I look back I think I only ordered actual tea at one house, and cookies or a candy bar in the others. Clearly, things I can easily handle myself – but oddly it doesn’t taste the same when you didn’t just pay $4 for a 75 cent candy bar.

Anyway, despite the challenges of camping, I’ll keep figuring it out because the hiking part is worth it. I just need to up my camp cooking game and find ways to make those freezing nights and miserable meals more enjoyable. And when I do finally reach town and enjoy a hot shower and a comfortable bed, it’ll feel like pure heaven.

Things That Go Bonk in the Night (Or at Least Early Evening).

An interesting postscript from once I returned to civilization is that when it was about 6pm the day after I got back, I started freezing and shaking, but I was indoors. I checked the thermostat and it was 70’F. I even went so far as to check to see if the dog was cold, he was not. So, it’s possible it wasn’t even the ‘cold’ that was making me cold, instead it was coming from within. This phenomenon may be attributed to the extended period during which I was consuming very few calories while walking around 10 miles a day. I have a tendency towards hypoglycemia in the evenings if I do not snack in the late afternoon, but usually, I have some sort of warning sign like wooziness. Lesson learned: always have a 4 pm snack.

Today’s Camping Bloopers:

Let’s talk about tent stakes! Mine kept getting blown out by the wind so much so that it was become a recurring comedy sketch. I even resorted to putting rocks on the rope for those mischievous stakes to try to keep them down, maybe that is just what has to be done during the wind. I might need to consult some YouTube videos to see if I’m just doing something wrong or if my tent has a vendetta against me.

And now for my ultimate camping fail: my finger vs. the rock. How did I manage to get a blood blister on my finger, you ask? Well, let me enlighten you with my brilliance. I was setting up my tent in a frozen-finger frenzy when I accidentally pounded my finger between the rock and the stake. And guess what? I didn’t even notice until the second hit! I guess paying attention is overrated. On the bright side, I now have expert knowledge in draining blood blisters. Life skills, right?

Conquering Camping:

In conclusion, camping may not be my natural talent, but I’m determined to conquer it nonetheless. I’ll laugh off the freezing nights and find ways to make those powdered mashed potato meals a little more enjoyable. And when I finally embark on the Appalachian Trail in March, I’ll bring along my experience, humor, and maybe even the dream of a drone-delivered pizza. Hey, a hiker can dream, can’t they? Remember, fellow adventurers, even our camping failures make for great stories. So keep hiking and embrace the unexpected on your outdoor escapades!

My Reward:

After days of roughing it in the wilderness, I felt like I deserved a little treat. So, I decided to have a “fun day” after bidding farewell to the national park. I made my way to Desert Hot Springs to soak in a luxurious hot spring. As if that wasn’t indulgent enough, I also decided to try a Date Shake. Now, if you’re wondering what on earth a Date Shake is, let me fill you in. It’s like a milkshake but with a twist – it’s made with dates, a local delicacy from the Coachella Valley in California. The locals swear by it!

As I told my friends, “I’m seriously failing at this voluntary vow of backpacker poverty.” This does not mean that I intent to platinum blaze the AT, but every now and then, I need a little sparkle in my life. A touch of platinum, if you will. I may be an avid hiker, but I’m not in my twenties anymore. Gone are the days of crashing on floors and surviving on low-quality munchies. My body demands a little more tender love and care these days.

In Closing:

Until next time, my adventurous friends! Stay tuned for more tales of triumphs and mishaps. And if you have any recommendations for some platinum experiences along the AT please let me know, particularly if they involved giant pools of hot water or milkshakes.