From Gungho to Uh-Oh

The thought of leaving in less than four months has me extremely excited. 108 days is all that separates Michelle and I from Harper’s Ferry. I’m also a little panicked, though, because I still need to get a lot done in the next 108 days. There’s insurance to figure out, since I will no longer be employed. I still have to do something with all of the crap that I own. I should work out some, but Netflix. That’s not even all of it. I still need to put together mail drop boxes, get plane/bus tickets to Virginia and ask my mom for permission to go. Just kidding, she already said I could

I do take solace in the fact that we have all of our gear for the trail, or at least I do. Michelle still needs to get a backpack, sleeping bag and a few other things. What a slacker. I’m not going to give you a run down on what I am bringing. My gear list is no different than the thousands of other gear lists on the internet, and I don’t care enough to make some stupid spreadsheet showing you how much everything weighs. I have to fuck around with Excel enough at work, and I have no desire to use it in my off time.

Instead, I am going to be completely candid with you for a moment. I don’t think the reason I am feeling panicked is because of everything I still need to do before leaving, but rather I am starting to realize the gravity of the situation ahead. What am I doing this? Everyone I know is going to be taking relaxing trips to the beach this year, and I’m over here like “yeah I’m going to live in the woods for six months.”

Become a mountain dwelling, homeless dude. Great life decisions Josh.

What the hell am I thinking? How do I plan on walking 2,000 miles when I hate taking the garbage to the curb on trash day? What am I going to do without my dog? What if I cant find a job when I get back and I have to strip for money? HOW AM I GOING TO WATCH THE NEW SEASON OF GAME OF THRONES?!

Ok I am exaggerating a little, but you get my point. I’ve got a case jitters is all. Is it going to stop me? Shit no. I’m sure the feeling will come and go for the next few months. It just feels good to admit that I am not without fear.

I really will miss my dog though.

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Comments 4

  • Matti : Jan 30th

    Awesome. GAAAAHHHHHH I feel exactly the same way!

  • philip (epiphany) shipley : Jan 30th

    I am in the same situation. I am 3 months from starting at springer mtn. quitting my job and going to live in the woods for 4 months. I am 66 years old and haven’t camped since college. have most of my equipment but still need to figure out the food situation. 6 months ago I got to a point in my life where I just needed to get away then one day I had an epiphany, hike the trail. epiphany is my trailname by the way. I am having the same sensatons one day nervous and the next gungho and ready to go. I have to go because it is something I just have to do.

  • Station : Feb 25th

    You’re doing this because you’re crazy and have to let your freak flag fly. You’re doing this because it is the adventure of a life time and you only get so many opportunities to do something like this. You’re doing this so GRRM might publish TWOW before you get back so you can read it before watching the new season, and if not at least you can binge the whole thing without waiting a week between episodes. You’re doing this to be an inspiration to your future self, and also to friends, family, and random internet strangers. You got this.

    • Josh wender : Feb 26th

      Haha I like the way you think station!


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